Parental Alienation Syndrome: A Systemic

Parental Alienation Syndrome: A Systemic Perspective

One of the unfortunate consequences of marital dissolution is the impact that it can have on the children of the marriage, particularly younger children. In those situations where children are trapped in the middle of parental conflict and leads to separation or divorce, studies have shown that they are at a higher risk for a number of psychosocial problems, including intentional efforts to ally children with one parent in ways that pit the parent against the other. These efforts become particularly harmful in those cases where the alignment becomes sufficiently entrenched in children that they actually collude with one parent to reject the other parent entirely, or to denigrate the other parent who had previously been cherished and loved. Parents who intentionally encourage these types of alignment are using what has been termed parental alienation (PA) strategies that are intended to turn a child against the other, targeted parent. In many cases, the parent employing these strategies is still highly resentful of the events that led to the dissolution of the marriage -- which may include violence, ruined finances or infidelity -- and their rage spills over in ways that intentionally involve the children of the marriage in an effort to strike back at the other parent. These efforts, though, can adversely affect the feelings of the alienated child for the targeted parent, in some cases for life. These efforts by the alienating parent also ignore the fundamental needs for children to have a separate and independent relationship with the other parent, which is typically the father (Gardner, 1998).

Although the reference is of fairly recent origin, Andre (2003) suggests that, "Parental alienation and PAS have probably existed for as long as contested divorces have occurred, but they were first identified in professional literature about two decades ago by Wallerstein and Kelly. Wallerstein and Kelly (1980) described a pathological alignment between an angry divorcing parent and his or her child" (p. 8). According to Baker and Andre (2008), the parent with primary custody of the child or children of the marriage holds most of the cards, at least from a logically perspective if not a legalistic one. In this regard, Baker and Andre note that, "Through various strategies such as bad-mouthing, limiting contact, belittling, and withdrawing love, the alienating parent creates the impression that the targeted parent is dangerous, unloving, or unworthy, thus compelling the child to reject that parent" (p. 10). When these types of behaviors are taken to their extreme and a child rejects the targeted parent entirely, the result is known as severe alienation or parental alienation syndrome (PAS) (Gardner, 1998).

During the 1980s, a grassroots movement emerged among fathers whose children were being used as virtual weapons in divorce proceedings for purposes of vindictiveness, leverage, or even extortion. According to Carbone (2000), fathers' advocacy groups also co-opted the reference to "parental alienation syndrome" to describe their plight in gaining equitable access to their children following a hotly contested divorce. These fathers maintained that many mothers, angry as a result of the emotional conflicts that produced the divorce, poisoned their children's relationships with their fathers and interfered with the father's efforts to maintain a meaningful relationship with their children. As a result, Carbone emphasizes that, "Custody and visitation fights had replaced fault-based accusations as the new divorce battleground" (p. 184). Whether these trends were a result of a more enlightened group of fathers or the result of an increasingly litigious society, the fact remains that these early efforts have spawned new interest in identifying what course of action is best for the interests of the children involved rather than a rubber-stamp approach to divorce that automatically awards custody of minor children to the mother and all of the expenses of the relationship to the father. As Carbone points out, "These fathers embraced joint custody and the 'friendly parent provisions' that provided for the award of custody to the parent most likely to insure the continued involvement of both, as a way to secure recognition of a right to continued contact with their children and to enhance their bargaining power in the custody and visitation wars" (Carbone, 2000, p. 184). Alas, "war" reference is all-too-common when it comes to how many divorces are perceived by both the litigants as well as the children involved, and it is these issues that form the problem to be considered by the study proposed herein and which is discussed further below.

Statement of the Problem

When minor children are used as weapons in the divorce war, no one wins and indeed, everyone involved loses to some extent. A hate-filled mother, for example, may succeed in persuading her children that their father is unworthy of their love and affection and they should try to avoid contact with him at all costs, but this will only harm the children and their relationship with the estranged father. In such cases, the mother may win a brief legal and emotional battle but she will have lost the moral war. Likewise, the children will lose out on a meaningful and close relationship with their father (although in parental alienation syndrome, the roles can easily be reversed but because the vast majority of cases involved the mother as being the alienating parent and the father being the targeted parent, these references will be used throughout the proposed study).

When family law attorneys weigh in on these issues and manage to convince a court of competent jurisdiction that it is in the children's best interests to have sole custody assigned to the mother in spite of these alienation efforts on her part, the problem is further exacerbated. In contrast to sole custody of children following a divorce, joint physical custody contrast, requires that the child or children reside with both of the parents, typically on an alternating basis (Carbone, 2000). The author of the Parental Alienation Syndrome, Richard Gardner, recommends a change in custody in just a relatively small percentage of parental alienation cases, but emphasizes that family courts rarely follow his recommendations even in the most extreme situations. In this regard, Gardner uses the term, "parental alienation syndrome," to mean inculcating or programming (e.g., "brainwashing") the children of the marriage by one parent in order to denigrate the targeted parent, but also to describe self-created contributions by the children involved in ways that reinforce the preferred parent's efforts to denigrate the targeted parent.

Moreover, Gardner emphasizes that such denigration efforts inevitably succeed when the campaign is unrelenting and children are not provided with a balanced view of the issues involved. According to Andre (2004), "In 1985, Richard a. Gardner, MD, further delineated the pathological alignment as occurring between a 'brainwashing' parent and a contributing child, and named the phenomenon Parent Alienation Syndrome (PAS)" (p. 8). Regrettably, Andre adds, Gardner's seminal work is largely ignored in favor of criticisms leveled against his recommendation that severely alienated children should be completely removed from the home of the alienating parent. As Andre points out, "This has stirred considerable inquiry into whether or not this can be effective without traumatizing the child. Gardner has also been criticized for his initial position that most brainwashing parents are women. This position is one which he later reversed, in part due to changes in societal mores, noting that 'men and women are equally likely to be PAS indoctrinators' (Gardner, 2001 quoted in Andre at p. 8),

It is important to note, though, that not all cases wherein the children of a failed marriage are cautioned to avoid further contact with a noncustodial parent are misplaced. There may be past instances of physical or sexual abuse involved, for example, or problems with substance abuse, and the custodial parent may have legitimate fears concerning the safety of the children during unsupervised visitations or in a joint custody arrangement. Nevertheless, the incidence of hostile parents using their children as tools to manipulate both the courts and to harm the targeted parent have become increasingly well documented. For instance, according to Greif, "The PAS and Gardner's work are well-known within the legal system. As such they are part of the collective conscience of parents' seeking changes in custody. The refusal of a child to visit a parent can be considered part of the PAS or have nothing to do with such a syndrome" (p. 134). Moreover, Andre (2004) emphasizes that, "Proponents applaud PAS as a distinctly diagnosable phenomenon and appreciate the clarity it brings to diagnosis and treatment of intra and interfamily dynamics. Critics sometimes go so far as to deny it exists. Some courts have recognized it, while other courts have barred testimony on it" (p. 7).

Therefore, it is not possible to assert that all cases where allegations of mistreatment or unfitness for parental involved are unfounded, but rather it is possible -- and important -- to take the parental alienation syndrome into account when formulating these decisions on a case-by-case basis. In this regard, Greif emphasizes that, "As with many family issues, an assessment has to be made with an awareness of the various possibilities before a decision can be made about how to interpret and act on the information. Application of the PAS to the myriad cases that include some rejection of a parent by a child involves the eye of the beholder" (Grief, 1997, p. 134). When the rejection of a parent by a child is taken to the extremes that are characteristic of parental alienation syndrome, though, the outcomes will inevitably be harmful for both the targeted parent as well as the children involved and these issues form the purpose of the study proposed herein which is discussed further below.

Purpose of Study

The overall purpose of the study proposed herein is to provide a systemic analysis of the current dynamics of divorces in South Africa and how these affect the children of these failed marriages. This social issues is especially well suited for analysis from a systemic perspective because this analytical approach is designed to examine the operational dynamics of the social and structural dimensions of society or group. According to one authority, "The analysis includes, but is not limited to, the dynamics of power, voice, inclusion or exclusion, and consequent benefit or profit, harm or loss. It articulates the starting points one uses in analysis, and clarifies the consequences of using any particular starting point" (Systemic analysis, 2009). Likewise, Keating, Kaufmann and Dryer (2001) note that the strengths of the systemic analysis approach "rests in the holistic analysis of structure, relationships, and emergent dynamics of problematic situations. The fundamental systems principles underpinning the approach are developed to provide an essential 'systems background' as a foundation for the framework" (p. 772). A secondary purpose of the proposed study will be to help develop a network between fields, social services, forensic, having the South African context link between psychologists, social workers and legal sector to assist across contexts.

Importance of Study

The importance of a meaningful relationship with a divorced parent cannot be overstated. Studies have shown time and again that although children who are raised in a two-parent home enjoy a wide range of benefits across the life span, studies have also shown that maintaining a close relationship with a parent following a divorce is an important factor in these same quality of life indicators as well. Although current estimates concerning the number of minor children who are affected by parental alienation syndrome in South Africa are sketchy, based on current statistics, it is reasonable to posit that at least 3,300 minor children each year become new victims of this serious syndrome -- and probably more given the lack of reliable statistics concerning total divorce rates among the rural population -- and there remains a glaring lack of initiatives in the country to address this problem. As a result, the field of psychology in South Africa has earned a poor reputation when it comes to formulating timely interventions for the problem of parental alienation syndrome, and given the lack of attention to the problem, it is little wonder that well-meaning therapists lack the requisite skills needed to deal with PAS due in part to both a scarcity of limited resources as well as a gap in the literature from a South African perspective. The findings from the study proposed herein, then, could help fill this gap and identify an interdisciplinary approach that could be used in a variety of settings to address this serious problem that has received little official attention over the years.

Scope of Study

Although the proposed study will consult the peer-reviewed and scholarly literature concerning parental alienation syndrome as it has been studied in other countries, there will be a specific focus on interpreting this information as it applies to a South African context.

Rationale of Study

Despite a growing body of evidence that suggests parental alienation syndrome is an increasingly serious issue and its impact on the alienated parent and the children of the marriage can have lifelong implications, there remains a dearth of timely and relevant studies concerning this phenomenon in general and as it applies to divorced parents in South Africa in particular. Therefore, the study proposed herein represents a useful starting point to establish benchmarks and identify opportunities for improving the manner in which divorcing parents manage their new relationship. This approach is congruent with Baker and Andre (2008) who emphasize that, "Sound practice in clinical work with alienated children and their targeted parents suggests that assessment and recognition of parental alienation and parental alienation syndrome is a critical starting point" (p. 10).

Likewise, a systemic analysis of how parental alienation syndrome affects both parents of a failed marriage can illuminate both sides of the issues involved in ways that may not be otherwise possible. In this regard, Carbone emphasizes that, "A clearer understanding of the terms of engagement, one that starts with a presumption of both parents' continuing involvement but also recognizes clear grounds for disqualification, would benefit everyone" (Carbone, 2000, p. 240). These are particularly important considerations because of a fundamental paucity of relevant work in this area from a South African perspective. For instance, to date, there have been at best just three books that even refer to PAS in the South African context briefly and none of these have been written or published thus far on PAS alone. Therefore, the study proposed herein represents a timely and valuable contribution to the area of family jurisprudence and counseling as it applies to South Africa and can provide useful insights and recommendations for practitioners and policymakers alike.

Overview of Study

This proposed study intends to use a five-chapter format to achieve the above-stated research purposes. Chapter one of the study will be used to introduce the topic and issues under consideration, provide a statement of the problem, the purpose and importance of the study, as well as its scope and rationale. Chapter two of the proposed study will provide a critical review of the relevant and peer-reviewed literature concerning parental alienation syndrome and an overview and analysis of salient South African family law considerations. Chapter three of the study proposed herein will be used to describe more fully methodology used, including a description of the study approach, the data-gathering method and the database of study to be consulted. Chapter four of the study will consist of an analysis of the qualitative data developed during the research process and chapter five will present the proposed study's conclusions, a summary of the research and salient recommendations for family counselors and policymakers alike.

Methodology

The methodology to be used in the proposed study will be a mixed approach. The first part of the methodology will consist of a critical review of the relevant secondary peer-reviewed and scholarly literature concerning the impact of divorce on minor children in general and in South Africa in particular as well as the dynamics involved in situations that develop into parental alienation syndrome. This step is highly congruent with a number of social researchers who emphasize the need to analyze what is known about a topic before formulating conclusions and developing recommendations. In this regard, Fraenkel and Wallen (2001) note that, "Researchers usually dig into the literature to find out what has already been written about the topic they are interested in investigating. Both the opinions of experts in the field and other research studies are of interest. Such reading is referred to as a review of the literature" (p. 48). In addition, a well conducted literature review can help identify any gaps in the literature that can form the basis for recommendations for future research initiatives. For example, Gratton and Jones (2003) advise, "A literature review is the background to the research, where it is important to demonstrate a clear understanding of the relevant theories and concepts, the results of past research into the area, the types of methodologies and research designs employed in such research, and areas where the literature is deficient" (p. 51).

The second part of the proposed study will consist of a survey of divorced South African fathers to obtain primary information concerning their experiences following a divorce and what their perceptions of the legal process has been in terms of visitation rights with their minor children. Subjects for the survey will be recruited using both online forums for South African fathers as well as advertisements for subjects in South African male-oriented publications. The family advocate's office as well as the organization, Fathers for Justice, will also be approached to recruit subjects for the study proposed herein. This step of the methodology for the proposed study is also highly congruent with a number of social researchers who emphasize the need to incorporate primary research whenever possible. In this regard, Dennis and Harris (2002) emphasize that, "Primary data are information that is being collected for the first time in order to address a specific research problem. This means that it is likely to be directly relevant to the research, unlike secondary data, which may be out of date or collected for a totally different purpose. Ideally, an effective research project should incorporate both primary and secondary data" (p. 39).

Preliminary Review of the Literature

By far, the most common grievance of divorced fathers is that their access to their children is being constrained in a variety of ways by the mother. According to Greif (1997), fathers who have experienced this type of manipulative behavior and response from their former wives have speculated as to the motivation, and theories concerning this behavior ranges from a revenge-seeking motive to a general conspiracy against men while yet others have no explanation in mind and are at a loss to understand how the former love of their lives has turned against them so completely as to implicate their children in the process. Generally, efforts to keep fathers from their minor children following a divorce assumes two different forms as described in Table 1 below.

Table 1

Two Forms of Blockage Characteristic of PAS.

Form of Blockage

Description

The mother makes scheduling of visitation difficult and the children unavailable (for visits, phone contact, or written correspondence).

In this form, the father believes extreme efforts are being made to prevent his having contact with the children because the mother is acting on a vendetta. The children are often not aware of what is going on. In a less vindictive variation of this scenario, the father is not being blocked because of what he has specifically done. The mother may honestly believe it is not in the best interests of a young child to see the father because of the confusion that the child is experiencing. When visits are scheduled, competing plans are made for the children and the children are not encouraged (as opposed to being actively discouraged) from visiting the father (Grief, 1997).

The mother has poisoned the child against the father.

Gardner's parental alienation syndrome would include poisoning of the child, together with the child assuming some ownership of the rejection and a mother could be rejected using the same reasoning. In this form, the children frequently refuse to visit their father because of what they have been told about him or because their negative impressions have been reinforced by the mother. The impression here is that the mother is actively working to turn the children against the father (Greif, 1997).

The above forms of blockage of visitation with minor children by one parent against the other can provide a valuable clue concerning recognizing parental alienation syndrome (Greif, 1997). As noted above, though, there may be valid reasons for these types of behaviors so it is imperative that mental health providers and family law advocacy groups to ensure that there is a legitimate case of parental alienation syndrome taking place before proceeding. In this regard, Baker and Andre (2008) emphasize that whether the goal is to stop any further degradation of the parent-child relationship and eliminate any additional adverse effects of parental alienation or the goal is the restoration of a parent-child relationship that has deteriorated, it is important for practitioners to ensure that they analyze and interpret the family dynamics in order to distinguish between a child's rejection of a parent that is attributable to parental alienation from a child's rejection because of other causes such as estrangement or previous instances of abuse. In sum, Baker and Andre note that, "Discerning alienation from legitimate estrangement must be first" (1997, p. 11).

Unfortunately, just as there remains a dearth of timely and relevant studies concerning PAS in general and as it applies to a South African context in particular, there is a similar lack of universally accepted tests and diagnostic methods that can be used to identify parental alienation syndrome; furthermore, there remains a lack of a consensus among practitioners concerning which tools are best suited to assist in the diagnosis of PAS (Baker & Andre, 2008). According to these clinicians, "A recent survey of custody evaluators revealed a lack of consensus regarding diagnostic and assessment tools (Baker, 2007). For a diagnosis of PAS, we recommend making an assessment through determination of the presence of the eight behavioral manifestations of PAS (described below), while ruling out alternative explanations for the child's behavior such as bona fide abuse of the rejected parent" (p. 11). The process involved requires a significant amount of effort on the part of the clinician, though, and involves observing and speaking with the child, as well as observing the child with his or her parents in order to determine whether the child is demonstrating the eight behavioral manifestations associated with PAS which are described further in Table 2 below.

Table 2

Eight Behavioral Manifestations Associated with Parental Alienation Syndrome

Behavioral Manifestation

Description

A campaign of denigration

In this first manifestation, the child becomes obsessed with hatred of the targeted parent. Parents who were once loved and valued seemingly overnight become hated and feared. This often happens so quickly that the targeted parent cannot believe that a loving child has turned into a hateful, spiteful person who refuses to so much as share a meal.

Weak, frivolous, and absurd rationalizations for the depreciation of the targeted parent

The objections made in the campaign of denigration are often not of the magnitude that would lead a child to hate a parent, such as slurping soup or serving spicy food

A lack of ambivalence about the alienating parent

It is a truism of development that children are ambivalent about both of their parents. Even the best parents are imperfect or sets limits that cause resentment and frustration. A hallmark of PAS, however, is that the child expresses no ambivalence about the alienating parent, demonstrating an automatic, reflexive, idealized support. One parent becomes all good while the other becomes all bad.

The child strongly asserts that the decision to reject the other parent is his or her own.

This manifestation of behavior is what Gardner (1998) termed the "Independent Thinker" phenomenon in which the child adamantly claims that the negative feelings are wholly his or her own. These children deny that their feelings about the targeted parent are in any way influenced by the alienating parent. An observer might conclude that the child has been brainwashed or unduly influenced, but, to the child, the experience is authentic and self-generated.

An absence of guilt about the treatment of the targeted parent

Gratitude for gifts, favors, or child support provided by the targeted parent is nonexistent. PAS children will try to get whatever they can from the targeted parent, believing that it is owed to them and that because that parent is such a despicable person, he or she doesn't deserve to be treated with respect or gratitude.

Reflexive support for the alienating parent in the parental conflict

In this manifestation of behavior, there is no willingness or attempt to be impartial when faced with inter-parental conflicts. The PAS child has no interest in hearing the targeted parent's point-of-view. As Gardner noted, PAS children often make the case for the alienating parent better than the parent does. Nothing the targeted parent could do or say would make any difference to the PAS child.

The presence of borrowed scenarios

PAS children often make accusations toward the targeted parent that use phrases and ideas adopted wholesale from the alienating parent. One clue that a scenario is borrowed from an alienating parent is the child's use of language and ideas that he or she does not seem to understand, such as making accusations that cannot be supported with detail or using words that cannot be defined.

The hatred of the targeted parent extends to his or her extended family.

Not only is the targeted parent denigrated, despised, and avoided but so too are his or her entire family. Formerly beloved grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins are suddenly avoided and rejected (Baker & Andre, 2008, p. 11).

An analysis of child's behavior using these eight components of PAS as a framework can assist the clinicians in distinguishing between potential causes for the child's rejection of a parent because it is improbably that a child rejecting a parent as a result of abuse or poor parenting would manifest these eight behaviors (Baker & Andre, 2008). In this regard, Baker and Andre note that, "Research and theory on abused and traumatized children consistently highlight that these child victims are quick to absolve the abusive parent of all blame and express quite strongly the wish to be reunified with that parent. Further, research with targeted parents supports the presence of these eight symptoms in alienated children" (p. 11). Beyond the foregoing eight behavioral manifestations, Andre (2004) provides the following checklist of questions that clinicians should consider in order to diagnosis parental alienation syndrome (diagnosis occurs on a continuum, from mild forms of parental alienation to severe PAS):

1. Was there a high-conflict divorce and/or contentious custody litigation?